The Hill... the untold story of Jack and Jill and Craig

The weather changes a lot on the hill that was owned by Jack and Jill.  It rained yesterday and today fire flies are flying above the rose bushes trying to catch shade from the sun. The untouched hill was a grassy field. It has never seen sharpened blades nor any other cutting utensils. Birds are chirping today and grasshoppers are singing a green song around the only man made item on this hill: The water well.

The water well was made out of magical bricks and old wood scavenged from a haunted pirate ship. The rope was made by a prostitute that once used the rope to tie up her customers. The small red bucket was bought at Wal-mart.

The well was built by a poor goose hunter named Craig. He was a well known goose hunter who killed the only goose in the world that laid golden eggs. Craig built the well with his bare man hands. The legend continues that Craig did not believe in tools or weapons. He utilized his "hands on" approached goose-hunting-style into his carpeting projects like this well... built using only his hands. The well project took 69 days and 32 nights until it was created. To bad there was no water! The well was always dry. The project was a total failure and unneeded! 

Until one day when Jack and Jill went up the hill. 

With a loud swooshing sound (I know, just sound out the word... "its a sound word") Jack and Jill was summoned to the well. 

"Its fucking water" Jill yelled!

They both looked at each other and started filling up their pale with water.

This must be some magical water they thought to themselves. 

"Maybe it will turn us into real people and not stupid kids characters, or maybe the water will turn what ever it touches into gold, or maybe the water will actually taste good?" They both suggested.

Jack thought to himself, "maybe it will make Jill shut up and finally put out!"

Jill thought to herself, "maybe this magical water will make me want to finally put out, either way I will act like it does... and I will finally let Jack have some... Ohh ya... all i have to do is drink some of this water and act like its magical... then act all horny.... Shit I might even state that this water is making me horny and just lay naked on this grassy hill!"

So, they both fell down the hill and the magical water was wasted! Jill felt sickened when she noticed Jack just laying there with his face on rock... there was blood everywhere! She ran to him and shook his body.

No response...

"Jack, Jack" she cried.

No response...

She ran back up the hill to fetch some more water to splash on Jack... but the well was empty. Bone dry.

"Dammmmn you magical well... on a hill," Jill continued to yell on her knees shacking her fist to the sky, "why would somebody built a fucking water well on a hill... FML!"